PDIS

Poor Joe came home sick from NYC on Thursday night. I don't even think he got much of a Harvey Peek when he came in the door; it was straight to bed! The next day I had plans to go to the orchestra with an old friend. It was her treat - best box seats in the house and a toothsome lunch beforehand at Estia on Locust. (I am still marvelling at how this place managed to go above Upper East Side prices for simple mediterranean fish, soup and a salad!) Martha Argerich graced Verizon Hall with Beethoven's second and afterwards the Orchestra continued the transcendental experience with Rimsky's Scherazade. The day was an absolute fairytale.

Meanwhile Harvey was babysitting his sick Dad and doing double duty as "Drawer Dumper". I returned home (trying not to feel guilty for abandoning sick-ship all day) armed with chamomile tea (2 for $4 at Genuardi's - store brand. I decided not to buy the luxury chamomile at $4.49 per box) and hot chicken soup from the deli. I opened the front door to discover that Harvey had been victorious over every shelf of books, every drawer of linens, and every last article of clothing that had already seen the floor 10 times this week. This week was the week I stopped folding the clothes before putting them back in the drawers.

There was a lot of cleanin' up to do.

Joe was limp as a rag in bed.

I set him up with soup and tea and then headed for the baby war zone.

I giggled to myself as I surveyed the damage , "What if I just left this place looking like this until the toothfairy comes to clean it up!" There was not a second to even contemplate picking anything up, because at this point the H-man was in full hunger mode, roaring and carrying on, reaching his arms up towards the soup pot with injured eyes as if to say, "How come Daddy got dinner and I didn't! No fair!" I set him up in his chair and tried to think of a quick dinner plan. Unfortunately I had thinned the soup quite a bit since Joe's stomach was in a delicate state, so I knew that transferring the soup into Harvey's mouth might be too sloppy and inefficient.

Sippy Cup and Straw!!! Yeah Yeah, that's it!

That worked for a few minutes until HS chewed the straw permanently closed and started cramming little fingers into the cup reaching for chicken and noodle chunks and splashing stuff all over. OY! So I dumped everything on a plate and gave him a fork and decided to just let him do his thing. He was having such a good time of it. Chuckling and giggling. Sheer pleasure - all of it. Splashing soup on his shirt and getting noodles and broth EVERYWHERE. What a royal mess. I started to laugh out loud which made Harvey laugh even harder. Soon we were going full blast in a laughing dialogue when the BUZZER RANG. (scary music)

Uh oh! I thought my student was coming NEXT Friday. A quick glance at the calendar confirmed I was Wrong Wrong Wrong and my student was HERE HERE HERE.

Now I didn't know if I should laugh or cry. Should I start throwing things in the closet? A garbage bag? Should I meet her in the hallway and tell her a bomb hit? I decided to face the embarrasment of exposing the results of the recent toddler attack. My student and her mother laughed out loud when I let them in and explained our situation. In fact, I actually became PROUD of this mess. "Look what my boy accomplished today," I was beaming from ear to ear.

I found out what the diagnosis of my condition is:

Parental Delusional Insanity Syndrome (PDIS)

PS Joe reported to me tonight that the store brand of chamomile was not very good...